Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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