I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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