you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
