So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
