i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Randomize
