Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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