I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
