She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
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