That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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