im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
