NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I look better un-naked...
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
