You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
