I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
how do flat chested girls get laid?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
