Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
