I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
