Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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