There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
no you cant smoke seaweed
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
