I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
