I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Randomize
