you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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