My Higher Power is John Stamos
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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