so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize