I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize