pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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