My friends, they love my intelligence
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
im about as happy as oj after his trial
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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