If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
