lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Betty ford says i'm here all night
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
