we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
