was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
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