Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
