I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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