I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize