I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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