butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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