so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
