the condom got lost in my hair
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
