Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Randomize