Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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