She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize