I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
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