The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Randomize
