His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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