I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
