How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
