just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
