Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
