Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Randomize
