my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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