On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
