she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
